Well here I am. Definitely the worse for wear. Life has thrown us some curveballs, that is for sure. I just thought I would get on here and try to write it out because I really need an outlet. Have been trying to be strong for husband but sometimes I just want to yell or scream and curse and vent. I should be making supper but I just d.o.n.t. feel like it.
Let's start with debt. We haven't done too bad with pay off. But we(I) have added some. We still of course have the mortgage. We also have Discover, Slate, Venture, 2 Care Credits and Value City. These are the accounts that we had been working on when I blogged before. I have added a 401K loan and Ashley furniture. (I might have done that before I quit blogging before if I remember right). We also have 2 medical debts that we had all this time that I just never listed. We actually had 5 at one time but we paid another one off last month so we are down to 2. Unfortunately we are adding more medical debt as I speak but hopefully we can pay that off as we go. Other than that I have added some Amazon and Walmart debt, though the Walmart gets paid off occasionally.
So, on to other things. My #3 sister is back in a wheel chair after another leg break. She is the one who suffers with syringomyelia. Her husband had prostrate surgery a few months back but seems to be doing fine now. January was a pretty calm month for us, thank goodness. Then came February.
At the beginning of February my mother in law was admitted to the hospital. We were under the impression that she was getting ready to be realeased. My husband and I work at the same place. One day he tracked me down in the break room to tell me that his stepdad had been trying to call him but when he called back there was no answer. I said I would try to get through but I couldn't but that I would keep trying as I had the opportunity. A short time later I got a text from one of my husband's cousins telling me that the stepdad was trying to get hold of my husband. So I told my husband over the walkies that we have to wear that he needs to call his cousin _______ or try his dad again. So as I was talking to a coworker and getting updated on work so that I could take his place while he went to break my husband came up to me and said that his mom was in a coma and it did not look good. So we immediately left work and raced home and arranged for my sister #2 to come and get the dog. My son who lives with us would take care of the cats. We got packed and headed out.. It usually takes us about 5.5 to 6 hours to get there as we often have to make pee stops. We were about and hour and a half away when his cousin called to ask where we were and we found out we were only about 5 miles ahead of her. So we stopped for our one and only pee break and grabbed a sandwich(we had left for work at 5am and I had not had a thing all day because I got distracted when hubby found me in breakroom) while we waited for cousin to catch up. We waited with her while she got something to eat and then took off. We finally made it to the town we needed to get to when husband's stepdad called to say that my mother in law had passed about an hour before. His son(my husband's step brother) was with him. We all went ahead and stopped at the hospital and was able to see mother in law before the funeral home came to take her. After that cousin went back home and we went to the house with stepdad. It was close to midnight by this time. The next day hubby, stepdad and stepbrother went to finalize arrangements and I stayed at the house because I didn't think I was needed but mother in law's dog had been moping since she was in the hospital and I didn't want to leave him alone anymore than we had to. We stayed with stepdad until the funeral and then stayed with him an extra day before we had to head home.
So now we make it to March, Hubby is having a hard time with his mom's death. My stepson had died 2.5 years ago and hubs has never got over that. One day hubby comes rushing into the house saying he fell off a ladder and hurt himself bad. His mouth was bleeding so we were taking care of that when hubby threw the washcloth into the sink and declared that he was fine! So he took it easy that night and the next day I had some errands to do and when I got back to the house he asked me if I would make him a Dr. appointment as he was hurting. I said I would not do that but I would take him to urgent care. So off we go. Urgent care asked a few questions and sent us to the emergency room as falls from ladders are considered potential traumatic injury. The emergency room took 6298 thousand x-rays, yes, I exaggerate, but it was a lot. The xrays did not indicate any internal bleeding or breaks so they gave him a splint for his wrist which was giving him quite a bit of pain. So we fill out FMLA papers and make an appointment with the work clinic Dr. for the next week. Hubby is still in pain and having trouble moving his arm. The clinic Dr. has him come back the next week and he is still in pain with limited use of his arm. More xrays. His arm is broken. So then we wait to get into an ortho Dr.
In the meantime, Hubby's very best friend who thought in December that he had beaten liver cancer but found out that his cancer was back in another spot is not doing well. The best friend passed away very early on a Wednesday morning. Of course it is the week that I have to work Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. The family had already made some plans so friends viewing was on Friday evening and his funeral was on Saturday. I called off work on Friday since there was no way hubby could drive himself to the funeral home and since I don't get off work until 6pm and it is at least 30 minutes back to the house to pick him up and then another 30 minutes back to funeral home. This puts me at 6 occurences for absenteeism. We are allowed 7 and termination on the 8th. The funeral was beautiful. The casket was made of barnwood and there was a picture of the friend and his dog and horses engraved on the lid. On the way to the cemetery we drove by his house and honked the horns for the dogs to look out the window and see their man go to his final resting place. At the cemetaey they had his horses their also. After the service they released mourning doves. (don't worry, the doves come back to their handler). My husband talks or texts with the widow every couple of days. She is really having a hard time accepting the death and is so very angry.
So, about a week after this, hubby gets a text from another cousin and she mentions that she did not know that Uncle ______ had had 2 mini strokes. Uncle _____ is hubby's step dad. Well, we didn't know either. So hubby calls step dad(and keep in mind that hubby calls him about every other day and asks him how he's doing). After they talk hubby tells stepdad that he wants him to talk to me. As he is handing me the phone hubby tells me to ask him about the mini strokes. So I did. Of course he down played it. So here is another worry. Step dad's son does live fairly close to him but step brother is very closed off and has not given us his contact information. Mother In Laws death was the first time I had met him and I have been around for about 16 years!
So, 2 weeks after the death of hubby's best friend. It's a Wednesday morning and I am talking with a couple of coworkers and one of our tech's, getting ready to send someone to break when I get a phone call from hubby. He is crying, sobbing, can hardly talk. Our 8 year old grandson was killed in a car accident. It had actually happened Tuesday afternoon so I don't know why we didn't find out until Wednesday at almost 10am. So I leave work and rush home and we pack up and take the dog to my sisters and head back down to KY. We go all the way to stepdad's house which is about 2 or 2.5 hours away from where the grandkids live but we didn't know if we would be welcomed or not. So we wait and wait. A GO
FUND ME page was set up. Then I talked to grandson's mom and she says that grandson is going to be cremated. So hubs and I ask my sisters to arrange a $2000 contribution to the GoFundMe and we would pay back whoever when we got life insurance money from hubby's mother's death. It was not a very big policy but we thought the grandson's mom was having him cremated because she couldn't afford a funeral. Our contribution put the fund over $13000, I believe. About half an hour after we did that, the grandsons mom called crying her heart out because 2 people had each donated $2000 to the fund and then the principal of grandson's school called her to tell her that a funeral home was going to take care of all the arrangements at no charge. But she was still having the child cremated because she wants to keep him near her. This is tearing husband apart because when his son died he was married to this same woman who decided that she wanted him cremated. This tore up both my husband and my mother in law who wanted to have him buried. So, having a funny feeling, I texted with my sister who had arranged the $2k contribution and asked her if maybe she accidentally donated twice. She said no, the contributions were made 17 minutes apart and her bank account only shows 1 charge. Then sister #2 says that "oh, that may have been me, I meant to contribute $200 but accidentally put in an extra 0". The next day she said it wasn't her, she just thought she would take the credit. Pretty sure the truth is she was loopy on her meds and didn't know what she was doing.
So this is late Thursday afternoon and the grandson's mom says she is not talking to the funeral home until Sunday to make arrangements. I am in a panic because I am allowed 3 days off work for death a grandchild. Wednesday did not count, but Thursday, Friday and Monday would be my 3 excused days. I could get another day without pay for traveling more than 250 miles, but even though we travaled more than 250 miles to get to stepdad's house, the place where the funeral is going to be is less than 200. So, the funeral ends up being on Wednesday. Now, keep in mind, when we were told that the child was going to be cremated we just thought that had already happened. We walk in and there is that sweet little angel laying in his casket looking just as beautiful in death as he did in life. So now we think there will be a burial but then we find out that he was still being cremated after the service. Neither one of us had considered that there would be an actual viewing. I have to say that the visitation and service was one of the longest 6 hours of my life. The heart ache and grief not to mention the drama was overwhelming. Fortunately, I was off work Wednesday, so I just get another occurence for Tuesday, which puts me at 7 occurences. I will have to work 385 hours to work it off, so hopefully I don't have a flat tire or get flooded in where I can't make it to work!
When we got home after the service (at 1am, that trip home is a long story in and of itself, we should have made it home by around 10:30pm at the latest) the life insurance check was here so we went today(Friday) and deposited that. So, anyway, I work Saturday and Sunday. On Monday I will go visit with my mom and take the $2000 we owe my sister#1. Sister#1 goes to visit my mother every day but probably will not be there on Monday as her husband just found out he has to have heart bypass surgery and is going on Monday to the doctor to get details on that. On Tuesday hubby goes back to ortho Dr. for his arm. I don't think he will be able to return to work as he is still having issues with movement.
Well, anyway, that just about covers most of the last 4 months. Hoping for better times ahead and to get through a whole day without shedding tears, not just for myself but for so many others, also.
Sorry if I rambled or made no sense.
